|
 | Procyon Herald - Issue 50: Scandal! Ravenwood Reveals he is 33 |  | |
Issue 50: Scandal! Ravenwood Reveals he is 33
03-31-2007 08:39
*The special Judicial Inquiry convenes on Planet Manhattan. The government prosecutor stands before a long table, at which is seated a panel of 9 august judges. Opposite them, in the defendant’s box, sits the reporter Ravenwood.*
Prosecutor: (pacing back and forth, with a smug grin on his face) If it please the Court, the defendant seated before you has unleashed a bombshell of a scandal today. First, he revealed that he was the notorious Rogue known as Ravenous. And now, he reveals that he is also 33. Ravenwood, do you confess to this as the truth?
Ravenwood: Yes sir. This is indeed the truth.
Panel of Judges: Gasp!
Prosecutor: And, in addition to admitting that you are indeed 33, you admit to writing the Herald all this time?
Ravenwood: I do.
Prosecutor: So, by implication then, you admit to having been a Bounty Hunter as well? Indeed, having started up a Bounty Hunter clan?
Ravenwood: (looking rather ashamed) I do. I mean, I was.
Prosecutor: And you confess to having been a member of other clans as well?
Ravenwood: (nods) One or two, yes.
Prosecutor: So you admit to having misled Procyon. Have you anything to say in your defense?
Ravenwood: Nothing. I just thought it would be fun.
Prosecutor: Fun, ladies and gentlemen. And why have you not revealed that you are 33 before today?
Ravenwood: Well, I didn’t wish to have the rest of the server population thinking I was a phony.
Prosecutor: And yet, now you are admitting having numerous smurfs and aliases?
Ravenwood: I don’t believe that’s a big secret anymore. Very well, I admit it.
Prosecutor: Now that you admit to being 33, what can we expect from the Sirius Republic?
Ravenwood: Well, you should really ask Bane. He was left in charge. I don’t run the clan. He does. I’m not sure what he intends to do with it.
Prosecutor: And now that you’ve revealed your secret, what do you intend to do?
Ravenwood: Well, I’ll probably celebrate tonight with a few friends at the pub.
Prosecutor: Yes, I would expect that it must come as some relief to get this off your chest.
Ravenwood: (shrugs)
Prosecutor: So now that you’ve revealed your true identity, can you explain to the Court why you chose the name Grand Admiral Thrawn?
Ravenwood: (directs a rather puzzled look at the prosecutor) Er…I’m not Thrawn.
Prosecutor: But you admit to being 33. We know very well that 33 is Thrawn. There’s no use denying it now.
Ravenwood: Um, I’m not 33comander, I’m 33. As in, years old. (looks at the bewildered prosecutor, whose jaw has dropped with the realization of his error.) It’s my birthday, you idiot.
Prosecutor: (after a short, confused pause) If…if it please the Court, I’d like to call for a short recess.
Ravenwood: Did you really pass the bar exam?
Back to the main page | |  | |  |
| HAPPY BIRTHDAY on 03-31-2007 12:38:45 | | |
LIKE HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAN | | | | |
| SgtWildman on 03-31-2007 15:33:11 | | |
LOL! I knew you were Ravenous..ROFL! | | | | |
| Crescens on 03-31-2007 19:45:22 | | |
I lul'd 8 - ] | | | | |
| Cobalt_Grizzly on 03-31-2007 21:08:18 | | |
Happy Birthday, man! Nice fake out too. Kinda figured what you were leading to, but I can never be completely sure with you. | | | | |
| JohnConner on 04-01-2007 00:30:01 | | |
Of course he passed his bar exam. Recently, I would say. Only a newly-minted prosecutor would be so sure of his facts as to not check his assumptions.
Nice work. And, Happy Birthday. | | | | |
| Lion on 04-01-2007 03:51:35 | | |
LAWL That was Awesome! You are great man! | | | | |
| Admiral Mank on 04-02-2007 11:07:37 | | |
Thats fantasic! You really had me going. | | | | |
| Third on 04-02-2007 11:19:16 | | |
greatness. | | | | |
| Alloy on 04-18-2007 22:25:01 | | |
Where are the new Issues! I loved this stuff! | | | | |
| Macavaty on 04-30-2007 21:55:04 | | |
Oh man, Raven. You are really too much. I couldn't believe what I was reading. You REALLY had me going. Loved it! LOVED IT! | | | | |
Add your comment:
|
